Pivot

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This space has gathered a fair amount of dust over the last few months. It would be easy to say that life is busy and I simply can’t find the time to write and share. Truth is, Happy by Design’s mantra hasn’t aligned with my life stage since midway through my second pregnancy. My son Louie just turned one so, yeah, that’s a lot of dust-gathering.

During intense seasons of motherhood, I essentially – and unintentionally – lean back, shut down and outsource. For me, it’s not the time to pursue passions or try something new. I attempted to get into weaving small wall hangings during pregnancy, in order to give my eyes a break from one of the multiple screens. Patience was thin, the DIY loom had issues and work always won.

Our family had to shift to make space for our son, Louie, and I unknowingly took a break maximizing, foraging ahead and trying anything new. Rather, I looked inward and focused on the essentials to keep the family afloat.

So, now what? It’s been a few months since the fog has lifted and, dare I say, it feels like there’s a regular cadence to our life.

My first pregnancy led me to create a personal blog where I tracked my daughter’s progress and confirmed that parenting cliches are indeed true. It was a space for me to share the “firsts” with family and friends and process my thoughts through writing.

Happy by Design was created because we had an itch we wanted to scratch, to explore other things that fill our hearts in addition to parenthood – our careers and health. But here’s the thing, those three topics: motherhood, career and health – they are not on the same playing field. Although training for a race, by nature, requires discipline, mental toughness and running shoes; motherhood is MOTHERHOOD and requires all of you. It’s an art, not science – and art gets messy. 

Today, Happy by Design means living an intentional life that includes big plans and mini-milestones: house projects, travel, community with a few personal and professional goals (vague enough?). What I’m getting at is this site will go on with thoughts on motherhood, wellness and DIY home improvements attempts.

Are you wondering, “What about Jamie?” We are fierce friends and our writing pursuits led us in different directions. Her space is about her thoughts and pursuits in writing, reading, career and life. I highly recommend checking it out and subscribing to her updates. I’m not just saying this because she’s one of my closest friends but her point of view is always spot-on, interesting and hilarious.

I’m thrilled to restart this little engine and refuel it regularly. However, if I need to hit the pause button and this space ends up in the repair shop, once again; thanks for understanding because, life!

The Fog

Ingrid and Louie

 

Over the holidays, my one of my girlfriends took me and the kids out to lunch. I was attempting to eat while holding Louie and had not perfected the “Mom juggle.” Moms who can effortlessly balance their forks, cocktail and children are like narwhals to me – unreal but they somehow still exist. She offered to take him off of my hands and pay for lunch. I politely declined. She insisted, took Louie and made an off-hand comment that I was “still in the fog.”

That comment stuck with me and provided me with perspective. Much-needed perspective. I have this unrealistic expectation I should be back to my normal weight, the house should be a certain way, my meals should be a certain way, my marriage should be a certain way. Self-induced pressures and anxiety, for no real reason.

As a new mom of two, the message from family, friends and society is clear: do not worry about the house, the laundry, meals or your weight. So-and-so and this-and-that will come naturally. Take it easy, let yourself get back to normal.

Lovely idea in theory but we need clothes, meals and a functioning home. That, and, societies expectations don’t align with the messaging.

Returning to work, by definition, gets you out of that new baby mode. There are positives, it’s good for getting out of yoga pants, routines are established. Things that would have fallen into place organically. Probably when my son started sleeping through the night, which happened a few short weeks ago.

So, what’s the fog? A compounding cycle of lack of sleep, long hours at work, quick meals, repeat. It’s tough.

To say it’s tough, is tough.

We’re forced back to work while we’re still in the fog. And that, not sleepless nights, is the real challenge.

We as a nation need to have kindness for new families. Everyone in the family needs to have kindness with each other, as a new baby is stressful for all. You need time as a family to become a new unit.

Think about how you welcome a new houseguest. Make sure they have fresh sheets, pick up their favorite cereal, they visit, pack up and head home. As a new parent you’re making room in the house and having hundreds of boring, necessary conversations. Conversations about where to store the bottles and “Do we have enough bouncers?” I still don’t know. All of that stuff becomes a conversation and everyone needs time to learn how to welcome this new house guest, permanently.

When Louie was born, he needed space we didn’t immediately have. We were a unit of three and enjoyed a flexible routine. We needed time to welcome this wonderful new being into our home wholeheartedly. This process takes time. It takes time to bond, takes time to understand his quirks, and until the ripe old age of twelve weeks, he’s a unpredictable, beautiful, needy mess. Right around the time the fog lifts, moms are forced back to work – awkward black pump bag in hand – and it’s downright laughable.

The fog needs to be recognized, realized, appreciated and valued. It does not magically drift away at six weeks, eight weeks or twelve weeks. It takes effort, time, and patience. A lot of patience and kindness.

New Baby. New Discovery.

Kids

The most stressful times in one’s life include starting a new job, moving and welcoming a new baby. Collectively, Jamie and I tackled all three over the summer. Our family welcomed little Louis Lee on August 2 – all nine pounds and two ounces. Rather than explain the lack of activity on the site, let’s dive into the joys of parenting.

Last week I listened to an interview on NPR. The host with a lovely, unique name, a requirement for all NPR hosts, was interviewing a travel journalist. The topic: career changes after having kids. I always marvel at the questions women are asked and often think “Would she dare ask this of a man?”

During the interview, the host chimed in to answer her own questions – she provided personal anecdotes about her own birth experience and maternity leave. She never thought of herself as athletic or having significant physical strength yet, after having her baby, she felt invincible. She couldn’t believe what she had accomplished. That made her wonder – what else can I do? How strong am I, really? What else can I accomplish?

Then, what happens after this monumental moment of self-discovery? Your world becomes small. Daily geography shrinks to a few rooms in your house. The focus, rightfully so, is on the baby. A very important, isolating time.

I had a C-section with my daughter and a VBAC with son. Although the experiences were vastly different, I felt the same sense of amazement and pride. My body was capable of so much more than I gave it credit for. In hindsight, that’s why I became a runner. I never considered running before having kids and told myself I wanted a quick, effective form of cardio. As I type these words I realize that’s was only one little reason. The real reason is because I finally had the confidence in my body and my mental toughness. When I’m facing a tough run or steep hill, I tell myself “You made another human. You can run up this hill.” And, it’s true. Moms do run up hills.

We research doctors, create meal plans and tour daycare centers. We write out birth plans while understanding we only have so much control. We eventually recover from pregnancy and birth. We nurse our babies. We fed our babies. We work hard to craft a life that makes us happy and fulfilled. Then we wonder, if I can do ______, what else can I do?

Happy New Year!

New Years 2012

I love the New Year holiday. The celebrations, the glittery hats and the promise of a new 12 month adventure. Like most, I have mixed feelings about creating resolutions. In theory, resolutions provide us with a road-map for the year ahead. Revisiting or creating resolutions can be the first step in achieving fitness, personal or professional goals.

Of course, they can also be a recipe for disappointment. Rather than create specific goals, I’d like to focus on one word for the year. Does it feel like a cop out? Sort of. To me, this fresh approach resonates and feels achievable. When the motivation balloon has been deflated I hope to revisit my “2015 word” to gather inspiration and keep chugging along. A list of contenders:

  • Positive
  • Gratitude
  • Yes
  • Brave
  • Possibilities
  • Happiness
  • Determined

“Yes” made the cut because I’m currently reading Amy Poehler’s book Yes PleaseWhat an inspiring read by a bad-ass, positive chick. Love this:

It’s called Yes Please because it is the constant struggle and often the right answer. Can we figure out what we want, ask for it, and stop talking? Yes please. Is being vulnerable a power position? Yes please. Am I allowed to take up space? Yes please. Would you like to be left alone? Yes please.

“Yes please” sounds powerful and concise. It’s a response and a request. It’s not about being a good girl; it is about being a real woman.

“Yes” is great but it’s not specific enough. My word for 2015 is determined. Said better,

Wake up with determination, go to bed with satisfaction.

Determination mantra!

Determination mantra!

I’m determined to be positive, express gratitude, say yes, be brace, embrace possibilities and seek happiness every single day. I’m determined to have patience with my family and myself. I’m determined to write children’s books, keep running and above all else – have fun!

Happy 2015!

Dear 41-year-old me

2014: Giraffes, princesses and sparkles are all the rage. 2024: A big fat mystery.

2014: Giraffes, princesses and sparkles are all the rage. 2024: A big fat mystery.

 

Let’s get real, it was scary to type 41. I will be 41 in ten years. Glup.

Today’s Blogtober challenge is to write a letter to ourselves in ten years. I wanted to tweak this topic and write a letter to my daughter, who will be 13. But I would be listing a lot of rules and cliche nuggets of motherly wisdom. There will be plenty of time for that, little one. Plenty of time for that.

I’m comfortable with the idea of aging and entering my forties. That’s not entirely true but, I’m less comfortable with the idea of my daughter being 13. The last three years and flown by and the idea of her riding a bike without training wheels and going on a sleepover is scary and surreal. Sending her off to middle school? There’s no way that can happen within the next decade, right?

Before dinner, Ingrid, Harper (our dog) and I went on a walk around the block. It took forever. Ingrid fell down, twice. She brought along one of her “big girl coloring books” (aka, one of Dan’s old Moleskine’s notebooks) to color pictures of leaves and flowers. Ten years from now I know we won’t have these simple, slow moments. Sure, we’ll come together to celebrate family traditions but we’ll be focusing on our separate interests too. Ten years from now, I hope to remember her exactly as she is today: aims to please, has a vivid imagination, pretends to attend “Disney school” and is obsessed with princesses. She was genuinely thankful that we painted her room. She’s exhausting, hilarious and weird.

Enough about today. Let’s look ahead to 2014. I apologize in advance for the confusing use of pronouns:

Hi Lindsay,

It’s 2024 and you’re killin’ it in your 40s. 31 year old me doesn’t have any words of wisdom or lofty goals for myself in 10 years. I hope you’re loving life, having fun and have finally stopped giving a shit what other people think. Why did you waste so much of your brain power on this in your 20s? 

Let’s assume you (or I, or we?) celebrated the big four-o eating, drinking and laughing your way through New Orleans with loved ones. Great choice. Let’s also assume Ingrid is a respectful, 13 year old.  Work is going well, right? I hope you’ve welcomed another little kiddo into the family. You’re focusing on your marriage and laughing every, single day with Dan. Looks like you’ve lost those last few pounds. I knew you could do it! If you haven’t, be happy with the body you have and take care of those arthritic knees!

Here are a few lingering questions:

  • Was the last season of Mad Men everything you dreamed it would be? 
  • Do they ever make a Harry Potter prequel? 
  • Are you still paying off your student loans?  
  • Did we ever seriously address equal pay for women? Yes, finally! 
  • Remember when “butts” were all the rage in 2014?
  • When was the last time you heard the song Let it Go? A week ago? Amazing.
  • How’s everything else going? Does Hillary take the cake in 2016? Awesome.

To jog your memory, here’s what’s going on right now in your little world: You are trying your best to make things better every day, for you and your family. You’re working hard now to create the life you (or I, we?) hope to have like, now, in 2024. To focus on your dreams, to keep writing, to support Dan and his dreams. To get a piece of land up north. To wake up every morning smiling. You hope to stop acquiring so much shit and be happy with what you have. I hope you kept up with writing and started putting yourself out there. Like, scary out there. I hope you went on adventures and camped, a lot. I hope you got over your crippling fear of failure. I hope you’ve experienced gut-wrenching failure. Recoverable failure, but still gut-wrenching failure. Most importantly, I hope you’re living in the moment with the ones you love! 

Stay true to yourself, smile a lot and call your mom! 

You got this! 

Three Positive Parenting Ads

Let’s start off the week on a positive note, shall we?

Typically, ads depict parents as outdated, hot messes. Until the holidays or Olympics roll around then, we’re hit with emotionally-charged ads that give us the warm fuzzies and we need to bust out the Kleenexes. Recently, I’ve been encouraged by a wave of positive parenting ads. These realistic ads showcase the best of parenting: it’s messy, fun, exhausting and rewarding. Case in point, I just typed “exhausting” twice.

 

Just in case these ads didn’t pull at your heart-strings, this one is sure to make you think twice about the overused phrase “like a girl.” Since watching this a few weeks ago, I’ve made an effort to not tell my daughter to “act like a lady” but rather, “please listen.”

Of course, these ads are meant to evoke an emotional response and leave you with a favorable impression of the brand. Mission accomplished. Share your thoughts and favorite ad in the comments below. Happy Monday!

Why Your Kids Need ‘Mom Selfies’

Mom Selfie

The most recent ‘mom selfie’ – Jackson really got into this one.

Writer’s Note: I had this idea spinning around my head for a couple weeks and it looks like I’m not the first. See related articles at the bottom of this post. 

Let’s get down to business. I want to talk about the ‘mom selfie’ – the photo you sneak with your son or daughter when no one is looking. I think it’s about time we shed some light on this much-needed selfie. If not for you, then for your kids’ sake.

But first, a trip down memory lane

Back in the time of my childhood – the mid 80s to early 90s – I remember my mom being around a lot. Up until I was five, she was a stay-at-home mom. Even when I started Kindergarten, she only worked part-time hours. It wasn’t until I was in middle school when she started to work a full-time job.

I have distinct memories of my mother from that time.

I remember that before I entered school, I was her errand-running buddy. I went to the craft store with her. I went to get groceries with her. When she had lunch dates with her friend, Kathy, I would tag along and wait for my turn to go up to the salad bar at Pizza Hut (And yes, I was the only kid I knew that preferred the salad bar over pizza). Sometimes she would take me to movies. We saw a lot of the Disney classics together, her favorite was Beauty and the Beast.

At home, I recall her sitting on the piano bench, talking to my Aunt Kathy (yes, two Kathys, stay with me now) while she kept an eye on the chocolate-chip cookies baking in the oven. I remember her  helping me across the jungle gym in our backyard and pointing out hot air balloons that were passing over our house.  I remember the smell of the cinnamon and candy ornaments I helped her make that were baking in the oven to be hung from the Christmas Tree and her singing along with Anne Murray while they went “walking in a winter wonderland” (Oh how I love Christmas!).

The point is, she was just ever-present. And if my memories were all that I ever had of her, I think that would be enough.

Present in memory, absent in photographs

But there are pictures of my childhood. Granted, not as many pictures compared to my siblings (I was the youngest of four), but I had my fair share.

However, when I look back at pictures I don’t see any of the things listed above captured.

My mom didn’t pose with me in front of the ornaments we just made to capture the moment. She didn’t lean over the grocery cart to get a goofy picture of the two of us “gals” just out and about. But to her defense, she didn’t have the luxury.

I can’t picture exactly how big our camera was back then, but it was big. And expensive. And surely not something you took out in public. And definitely not the sort of thing you could just turn around to snap a picture of yourself with.

But also, a lot of my memories of her are distinct times when it was just us, so no one was around to take a picture.  Maybe I cling to these memories of her because it’s those moments when I got her undivided attention. In a family of six, getting anyone’s attention for a long period of time was rare, so you cherished those memories.

So now when I see her in a childhood photo – it’s most likely a picture of our whole family, posed in front of  our Christmas tree. And the thing is – I don’t think that’s all too uncommon. Which makes me think, if she had the chance, would she have wanted to take a ‘mom selfie’ back then?

Overcoming the ‘absent mom in photos’ syndrome

Excuse #1: I didn’t have a camera readily available.

NOT AN EXCUSE ANYMORE…For the majority of us, we walk around every day with a camera just sitting in the ready position on our phones. And if you still use a camera, it’s either small and easy to bring with you, or you take pictures as a hobby and you have a super sweet camera. And if you literally don’t have a camera on your person, I’m sure one of your friends do. Either way – most of us don’t have the excuse of not having a camera accessible at almost all times.

Excuse #2: Nobody wants to be bothered to take a picture of me and my kid(s).

GET OVER YOUR PRIDE…Okay, so it’s easy to say that and it’s a lot harder to put into practice. I don’t like inconveniencing others, either. This one is tough for me, so maybe the next time you go to a fun event where you know you’ll want to take pics, just come up with a secret pact with a friend, “Hey, you shoot pics of me with my kid, I’ll do the same for you and we’ll swap.” Then at least there are fewer awkward confrontations like this, “Hey, hi there, sorry to interrupt, umm, can you take a quick picture? Thanks, sorry!!” I know how we can be. And if you still have to give the awkward proposition, just remember that this is just as much for your kid as it is for you (they just don’t know it yet).

Excuse #3: I [look awful/feel fat/need makeup/just woke up/am about to smack you with this pillow if you don’t let me sleep past 6am]…I don’t want to take a  picture right now. Plus, who wants to see me like this? 

LOVE IS BLIND…I know it doesn’t feel like love right now, but when I think back on memories of my mom – I can’t even recall what her insecurities were…because that’s not what I remembered about her. I didn’t remember whether or not she was wearing makeup on any particular day. I just remembered that she was there.

I know this is still a struggle because we all have our own insecurities. To date, selfies seem to be synonymous with “selfish.” But mom selfies? I think those should be synonymous with “selfless” because it means you’re willing to capture the moment even if you weren’t looking your best that day…so that your kid can look back fondly and see that you were there. And being there is a form of love. It means you care enough to show up…to be present.

The point is – don’t take mom selfies for yourself (well, I mean you can, no one is stopping you), take them for your kids. Take them for your kids so that when they look back at pictures of their childhood, they won’t have to solely rely on memories and pictures by the christmas tree.

Let’s start the mom selfie revolution

I’ll do my part to spread the word by sharing some of my  favorite and not-so-favorite (i.e. not fit for Facebook, Twitter or Instagram) mom selfies here. Are you willing to do the same? It’s easy! Just post a picture of you and your kid(s) for the world to see.  If your kid(s) are out of the house, post an older picture. If you don’t have any, find a pic of you with your mom (I’m sure you’ll score extra brownie points for that one). Post it to Facebook. Or post it wherever you’re comfortable. Just get it out there!

 

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And definitely do these three things:

  1. Take more mom selfies, and post them for the world to see (and if you need to work up the courage, take it anyway and save it in a safe place)
  2. Encourage your girlfriends to get in the picture with their kid (volunteer to take pictures of them, even!)
  3. Remember that it’s not about you, it’s about your kids, and they love you no matter what

Related Posts

The Mom Stays in the Picture

Why Our ‘Imperfect’ Moments Are Perfect to Our Children

 

5 Steps to Tackle Your Next Big Child-Rearing Challenge

Child-Rearing rears it's ugly head

“Some day they’ll figure out what they’re doing, little cuz…some day.”

Raising a child is fraught with many, many challenges. Some are big, some are small, but one common trait runs through all of them. They are all challenges that you HAVE to face. Not just challenges like, “Hey that looks fun, let’s go try that.” No, more like, “Our kid can’t eat table food without gagging and puking. What do we do?” or “This weird rash is not going away and I have no clue what’s causing it and no clue how to treat it. What do we do?” Okay, so those were more specific to my family, and some of the weird, unexpected things that we encountered. But a lot of parenting is just that – unexpected things you encounter.

Most of the advice you’ll get from friends/family/online forums is “Here’s what works for 85% of kids,” which may be fine for the majority of your child-rearing challenges. But at some point you will find yourself in an area (or many, in our case) where your kid is in the 15% and then you’re left wondering what you need to do.

So given that we’ve experienced our fair share of child-rearing challenges in just the two short years we’ve managed to keep our child alive (yay us!), I thought I’d share some helpful insight that might be useful for your next child-rearing challenge.  I’d say this system is 85% accurate. Take it with a grain of salt.

Step 1 –“Fake it till you make it”: Read one blog post about the particular topic, assume it’s going to be a breeze and that everything you’ve heard from others will not apply to you. Because your child is perfect and a genius and would never not do as instructed.

 Step 2 – Get pissed that this is not one of those times where you can “Fake it till you make it”: Spend a few weeks lamenting how you should have listened to your friends/family. Then, berate yourself for being a terrible parent who can’t raise a child as perfect and special as little Suzy down the street who mastered this specific task in about 3 hours.

Step 3 – Have a good cry: Pour a big glass of wine, forgive yourself for any wrong doing and move forward. Also important — forgive your kiddo who now refers to you as “Meany butt”… even though you both know it was an honest reflection of your current state.

Step 4 – Keep getting up after you fall down: Accept any help you can get, read more than one blog post on the subject and do not act like a know-it-all. Most importantly, be okay with the many (so many) mistakes that will happen along the way, all in the name of learning and improving and finally getting it right.

Step 5 – Get off your high horse (I mean it!): After all is right with the world and you have mastered the latest child-rearing challenge, do NOT be that parent that proclaims the one true way. Realize that your way was not what worked for others who tackled this before you, so don’t expect to be the one singular expert on navigating this tricky child-rearing challenge for those tackling it after you. If a friend seeks help, always be gracious and always preface your advice with, “Here’s what worked for me, but I know that other methods have worked for others, so take that with a grain of salt.” And then also point them to some helpful resources if you think of any.

I’m not just setting out this advice for you … selfishly it also serves as a reminder for me. It reminds me that things always get bad before they get better and that it’s important to stay the course and keep trying. So to show you I mean business, here’s how I’d like to apply it.

The next big child-rearing challenge: Potty Training

The plan of attack: I’ll skip right to number 3 because these things should always start with a big glass of wine and some acceptance for the challenges that lie ahead.“I’m learning. He’s learning. We’ll get through this. It will be messy. I will probably cry at some point. He will definitely cry at some point. Hubby will keep us on track. We will all be supportive and accepting of what may come.” And I’ll keep repeating that at every failure along the way.

The journey: We haven’t actually started yet, so I’m just now researching the many ways in which one could potty train their little one. Having said that, if you have any advice, I’d love to hear it. I’ll then let you know whether or not your advice was a load of crap (pun intended) or if it actually worked for my little one.

At some point I’ll check in and let you know how it went, most likely after we get through it as I probably won’t be in a good mind set when things get dirty (another pun intended).

Until then, keep your chin up. You’ll get through it.

Writing About Motherhood is Scary

Jackson crawling through a tunnel

You never know what’s around the next bend.

You may read that title and think, “What a hypocrite! How can you have a website aimed at mothers when you don’t even want to write about motherhood?”

Well, it’s not that I don’t want to – I do. I’m just scared to because there is SO much scrutiny around everything mothers do (and parents, in general).  When I write about wanting to advance my career, or wanting to be healthy, I’m fairly confident that there is a sizable population in the same boat as me.

But when it comes to my views on motherhood and parenting? All bets are off. There’s a really good chance that any opinion I share is going to be met with a backlash of some proportion because not only is it a topic that people are VERY passionate about (funny enough – they don’t even have to be parents to be passionate about it), it’s also a topic where people have very strong opinions on their version of what is right and what is wrong. How do I know this? Because I’m just as guilty. There are some things that I can let go, and there are some things that just immediately send me into hysteria. I feel it’s my civic duty to get up on my high horse and preach to whoever will listen about my views (which are the “right” views, of course…wink, wink) on that particular parenting topic.

A sampling of parenting methods…SCRATCH THAT….too exhausting. I’m only diving into food preferences

First off – I’d like you to know that my intent was to show how many different parenting methods and mantras exist on various topics. I got through food preferences (which again, aren’t all inclusive) and I didn’t feel like diving into any other topics. There was enough in that one decision of the millions of decisions parents make on a daily basis to illustrate my point.

Food preferences – what should your child(ren) eat?

  1. Organic and vegan only (nitrate-free, gluten-free, soy-free if possible).
  2. Organic and homemade. Get out of here, Velveeta!
  3. It doesn’t have to be organic, specifically, but maybe more heavily relying on fresh produce.
  4. Are hotdogs considered nutritious? Meh, who cares. They’ll probably get some nutrition at daycare.
  5. Organic shmorganic. I make comfort food. And Velveeta family meals are my main squeeze.
  6. I feed eight mouths, three times a day. Whatever keeps the grocery bill down is whatever they eat.

Now I’m willing to upset a large majority of my readers by letting you all know this one thing about my parenting preferences as it relates to food preferences. For the most part, I bounce between 3, 4 and 5. And I probably stay on 4 and 5 longer than I should.

But you know what? I know parents that fall at various locations on the spectrum. Does that mean I should be able to tell them whether they are right or wrong? Now some of you may say, “YES. Food is easy, Jamie. Kids should eat healthy foods. The healthier, the better.” And of course I agree with that statement. But am I going to tell the mom of eight kids that she is a terrible mom for wanting to feed her kids only what she can afford because she also wants to keep a roof over their heads? No. I cannot in good conscious make that judgment.

The root of it all

And that’s just it. I have a fear of writing about MY views on motherhood, because I fear the judgments that may usher forth from putting those views out into the world. But it also goes both ways. I also fear that some of the things I put out into the world will make others feel bad about what they’re doing as a parent. And that’s not what I want to create either.

I’d love to have a “Kumbaya” moment here with all of the mothers and fathers and grandparents and aunts and uncles and foster parents and anyone else that may take on a parenting role and say, “We’re all doing the best we can!” Which for the most part is true (there are always exceptions, unfortunately). But I’m not a sappy hug-it-out kind of a person so I’d like to just skip that and say, at least as it pertains to me, I’ll try to do a better job not judging other parents if you all try not to judge my parenting skills too harshly. Kapeesh?

What I will share with you

Whew! What a load off my chest! Okay, moving on. I know what I want this website to be – the same motto we have listed on the front page, “A community for mothers who follow their passions.” So I will be writing about motherhood, to some degree, because it truly is a passion of mine. But you won’t find me preaching “the one true way” or the “best way to be a mother” or any topics aimed to pit those who are stay-at-home mothers against those who pursue full-time careers while still being a mother (not even with a ten-foot pole). Because no matter what your method is, we’re all doing our best because our kids deserve the best. But I know that my best and your best may not entail the same journey. And I’m okay with that.

To be clear – you won’t see me getting up on my high horse about any parenting methods I use or don’t use. However, I’m going to share successes and frustrations as it relates to raising my little one. Because it’s not just about sharing your beliefs and views, but sharing how those beliefs and views actually translate into real life situations.

So I’ll leave you with this, because it’s always makes me laugh, but just know that I can’t take credit for it…

“I was a really good mom…until I had kids.”

Instagram

Sunday runday + Sunday funday + meal prep and getting real with the laundry situation = pass me another beer. 🤗

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Happy by Design

Thoughts about motherhood, wellness and life.

Blog - Coffee + Crumbs

Thoughts about motherhood, wellness and life.

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Thoughts about motherhood, wellness and life.

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a resource for Milwaukee moms

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